Reads I Love Archives - Kayli Schattner

Kayli Schattner

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April Reading List

April Reading List

I’ve deleted and rewrote this note hundreds of t

I’ve deleted and rewrote this note hundreds of times and I’m unable to find the words. I think because there are no words...and also, because I’ve never taken it upon myself to ask my Black friends, in their opinion, how I can best help at horrifying times like these. ⁣
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George Floyd is dead, was executed, and White people: It’s far past time that we stop relying on prayers for better outcomes. It’s time to take action against the injustice POC’s are facing in America. The brutality. The heartache. ⁣
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If you’re a White person reading this, I encourage you to imagine if you had to feel a pit in your stomach everyday thinking about the cruelness your partner might face walking home at night or getting pulled over for going a few miles over the speed limit on their way to work. I encourage you to feel the sheer terror of raising a child who might get shot if they forget their house key one day + have to climb in through an open window. To feel the insurmountable pain of someone you love being killed in their own home. Sit in that rage. In that discomfort. And know that that is reality for millions of Americans. Know that it’s our responsibility to (as the eloquent @ohhappydani put it) amplify the messages of POC + SPEAK when we witness injustice or have an opportunity to educate in our communities. ⁣
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I can’t possibly know what it’s like to be a Black person in America, to feel the pain their never-asked-for-this resilient souls must be facing; my whiteness has given me a privilege I only recently began to understand the depth of. But I do know that Angela Davis' words ring true, “It is not enough to be not racist, you must actively be anti racist.” ⁣
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I’m including links to resources in today’s newsletter for how you can take ACTION + am happy to send them via DM or email to you if you just let me know. ⁣
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At the very least, I encourage you to call: (612) 324-4499 and demand that the men who murdered George Floyd be arrested + sign the petition at JusticeForBigFloyd.com. ⁣
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Sending so much love and peace. ❤️ x K | Graphic by @shirien.creates

I love that late Spring here has brought earlier m

I love that late Spring here has brought earlier mornings, walking in the sun, more adventures with this little guy + the smell of flowers and mulch back into my life. ☀️ ⠀
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When we moved to Boston I had pictured the Spring with wine on patios, trips to outdoor seafood markets + ball games with friends and, of course, it has meant a lot of me grieving what “could have been.” Anyone else going through this? Mourning the loss of the life you thought you’d have? 🤔⠀
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It’s a process but I’m finding that this new season has made it easier for me to embrace the smaller things {{that I know are the big things deep down}} and appreciate all of the good in my life. It has also made me wonder, “What do I actually WANT to return to and what was I just USED to?” 〽️⠀
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〰️ I miss being squished next to strangers on the T, but I don’t miss being in such a RUSH to get everywhere that I never felt like I had enough time. ⠀
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〰️ I miss hugging my friends, but I don’t miss finding myself trying to find more positive ways to respond to, “So how have you been?” with exhausted or busy. ⠀
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〰️ I miss my Pilates classes, but I don’t miss feeling like it was just another productivity marker. ⠀
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〰️ I miss the popping into our favorite restaurant at the end of a long day for an Old Fashioned. I’m so excited to do that again. ⠀
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〰️ I miss travel and seeing the world through a new lens. It will be so lovely when we’re able to hop on a plane carefree again. ⠀
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〰️ I miss letting Stabes play at the dog park. It will be such a good day when we can go back. ⠀
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What about you? What are you going to leave behind? What are you looking forward to going back to? How has this new season been treating you? 💚 | #SpiffyStabler

No mini essay today: Just a lovely collage that th

No mini essay today: Just a lovely collage that the amazing @bcsdoodles made because she said it reminded her of me and a note to let you know that The Elevator won’t go out tomorrow, but will return next Friday! 🌸

Someone out there RIGHT THIS MINUTE is caring about you and you’re inherently worthy of needing a break. How amazing is that? Happy (almost) Friday, friends. 💫

A day late but #FormalFriday was just what the doc

A day late but #FormalFriday was just what the doctor ordered last night. A lot of grieving, release + sitting in discomfort this past week. Learning to find calm in the chaos + to keep going within within within — even when my insides are twisting into a knot of “but I don’t want to’s”... there’s relief in me always waiting to be found, I know. But the journey can feel so sticky. I described it to Aaron this week as a peanut butter sandwich getting torn in half. The two halves parting is so messy + the stickiness makes it tough to tear, but it has to be that way unless you keep it all together...and sandwiches are always better cut into two triangles, right? {{my brain was on overload + somehow this made a lot of sense at the time??}} I guess enough with 🥜 butter metaphors + I’ll leave it at this: I hope you’re finding joy this week — sending lots of encouragement, hugs + a cheers to you! We can do hard things. 🥂 || PS: Chose this photo because one of my very favorite things about my home is that GOLDEN HOUR light. 🌤 Magical.

I was in a journaling class recently led by the fa

I was in a journaling class recently led by the fabulous Emily Chertow. In a nutshell, it was a wellspring for connection, a breeding ground for creativity, and maybe above all, a space to spend two hours with a group of other people just trying to human (as a verb, please) the best they can too. ⁣
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About an hour and a half in Emily screenshared her laptop and we were able to see the words of Charles Harper Webb’s “How to Live” poem splayed across the screen. I instantly felt a tenderness in my heart and a remembrance ignited in my soul — she gave us a few minutes to free write and encouraged everyone to not lift pen from paper. I didn’t need to.⁣
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Within’ five minutes these words poured out of me:⁣
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〰️ Eat fruit from a roadside stand while laughing next to people you love. Let the juices run down your arms and stain the damn shirt — who cares?⁣
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Travel to new places often + let the wind caress your face in spots you’ve never been before; but never forget that home has the friendliest faces, most hearty belly laughs and best chocolate chip pancakes. ⁣
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Stand firm in the belief that you were made for something great, but never forget that every human being is — stay humble.⁣
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Dance with a cocktail in your hand alongside your lover while cooking by candlelight on the stove. Whatever it is, add white wine + let yourself feel sexy. Your body is sacred.⁣
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Make time for the things that make you feel alive. Let tears stain your cheeks with gratitude. Tell people what they mean to you. Kiss. Swim naked. Jump. Hug. Get on the plane. Ground yourself into the grass. Sit and listen to the water. Smell the flowers. Taste the bakery goods in that storefront window. Roll down the windows and let the wind tousle your hair. Life’s too short not to. 〰️⁣
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What I noticed about everyone’s poem? Not one person mentioned their career. The money they yearned to make. The body they craved more than that slice of triple layer chocolate cake. ⁣
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We wrote about things that exhilarated us, experiences that made our bellies feel tingly and our soul’s feel warm. We wrote about what it means to love, feel alive — feel truly ourselves. ⁣
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Food for thought. ❤️⁣

The Elevator Issue #6 (!!!) is out tomorrow + I’

It’s been on my mind a lot lately as to what it

It’s been on my mind a lot lately as to what it means to be someone who feels most themselves *out there* and how we can cope + stay at peace *in here.*
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There’s the usual things I do: Take a walk with Stabes, have my weekly call with my girlfriends on Zoom, and Aaron + I have weekly Friday date nights that we take turns planning. But what do those things all mean on a deeper level? They mean that I’m not pausing my life during this time — as my therapist so eloquently put it, I won’t look back on this time and think it all blurred together to amount to nothing special — I’m creating new memories that make me feel alive, they just look differently than planned.⁣
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While I’m not sitting outside at a cafe listening to the birds sing, I’m running along an empty beach barefoot in the sand. ⁣☀️
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While I’m not gathered in the living room of one of my friends, sharing a bottle of wine, I’m seeing their beautiful faces in the glow of my laptop screen; connecting over books we’re enjoying, the current state of our mental health and laughing over unprecedented situations we’ve gotten ourselves into. ⁣👯‍♀️👯‍♀️
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While I’m not on my planned New York City trip with Aaron, in the bustling streets of the city, feeling that electricity you only feel among other souls, we’re still dancing in the kitchen, generating our own special spark, creating experiences that will strengthen our relationship. ⁣❣️
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And that makes me feel alive — both out there and in here.⁣
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Some days, just getting out of bed seems like the only thing I can muster, but when I feel alive — most like myself — that’s where my personal magic is curated. ⁣
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What about yours? ⁣🌟

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